A few weeks ago, my friend Phil and I met with Mark Oestreicher before our Bay Area Youth Forum to help us get our heads around the unique context we find ourselves in and capitalize on those uniqueness so as to have a more effective and relevant student ministry.

Key to Contextualization

What MarkO pointed out is the very fine balance between one truth that every context is unique and the other which is that for the most part students are the same everywhere.  This really resonates with me.  We are all humans and we are all made in the image of God.  We all have the same longings and desires.  (N.T. Wright wrote about this in the beginning of this book Simply Christian)  But we all live in different contexts and these different contexts shape our worldview as well as our self view.  Because of this reality, the felt needs to which the Gospel can be shared will very from context to context.  Therefore, the trick is understanding the values of the context in which you live and so that you can capitalize on these values to find the “thin places” where the good news of Jesus meets people where they are at with language and stories that match their context.

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Normally I wouldn’t post a sermon I have preached on my blog. In fact there are a ton of reasons not to. I get that I a not the most compelling speaker, I am slightly below average in looks, and in this case I was a bit nervous because of the topic so I spoke a little bit too fast. I also get that you are a fabulous preacher and I am opening up myself to be seen as less than in your eyes.

But these are silly and vain reasons and I am all about the spiritual growth to combat these childish tendencies. Plus, the more I have been reflecting on this passage of in 1 Timothy, my church context, and my friends in ministry whom I would love to speak up for, I thought I would give it a whirl.

The relationship between the church and the pastor is a mysterious one at best. It always starts with such high hopes and expectations, and often devolves into disenchantment, bitterness, and pain. But if the church does these 2 things well, I think we as pastors will thrive a bit more.

Spoiler alert: one of those points is paying us well. I mean really well :)

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A Misunderstanding:

A few years ago I had a misunderstanding with a student.  But the difficult truth is that there wasn’t a misunderstanding at all.  We had a silly gimmick to attempt to get more kids to come to youth group.  For a month, every time a student came to youth group they got their name added to a raffle.  For every friend they brought, they got to add their name twice to the raffle.  At the end of the month we would draw a name and the winner would win a prize.  A dramatic and costly prize.  One of my seventh grade boys took this challenge to heart, igniting every competitive fiber of his being.

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Close your eyes and take a deep breath. Oh, wait, read the next line then close your eyes and take a deep breath. When you think of student ministry, who is the student that you imagine? Ok, now close your eyes and imagine those students.

When I do this exercise I imagine my upper-classmen. The students that I have knowns their entire adolescent careers. The students who I have the most invest in and the ones who are either starting to show some good fruit or have really dramatic stories as they spiral out of control.

Middle School youth group

The reason this exercise is important is because this is the demographic we program for and teach to. But the reality is that student ministry is not just these upper-classmen. They are the 11 and 12 year olds who are just starting the process of individuation, who have much less dramatic stories, who are still concrete thinkers, and are showing little spiritual fruit.

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youth specialtiesCan you believe it? It is finally here. That most amazing gift a church can ever give to their youth worker, a youth ministry conference!! Your bags are packed, your room is booked, and it is time to go and get some freebies. For one weekend we get to take off our mantle of responsibility and leadership, and become participants, students, and receivers. Whether it is Youth Specialties, Orange, Simply Youth Ministry, or I Still Do, a youth ministry conference is the one time a year that us youth workers get to actually go to camp, and not just put it on.

And like camp, there are some things that we need to do to prepare ourselves so that we can have an amazing time and get the most out of our time away. Every year before we take students to camp or on mission trips we give them a little pep talk, so here is yours :) These are the top 10 ways to get the most out of your conference experience. Continue Reading…

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This post was originally posted at youthministry360.com. Andy Blanks and his team there continue to crank out great material and resources for youth workers. (Thanks Andy for letting me be a small part of that team.)

The first couple years in youth ministry can be a trying time for many youth workers. At times it seems like each step could potentially have a hidden landmine underneath. While the most obvious landmines are easy to identify—staying within budget, maintaining appropriate boundaries with students, and communicating clearly with parents—one of the most dangerous ones often catches many new youth workers off-guard.

One of the biggest mistakes new youth workers can make is failing to fully understand their relationship with their supervisors.

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Don’t church plant.

October 8, 2012 — 9 Comments

I know you are awesome.  In fact everyone at church confirms this to be true.  At this point is becoming a conviction that by limiting your gifts to the realms of student ministry would be a crime.  Numbers don’t lie and your ministry has exploded under your leadership and you are ready to proclaim the word to the masses!  But before you jump ship in order to follow “God’s Call” to become the next church planter mega success, let me share a few words of caution . . .

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Your amazing ministry was actually built by somebody else.

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This article was originally posted on youthworker.com.

It is impossible to walk through a retail store these days and not be overwhelmed with Halloween. Since the beginning of September, aisles of orange and black decorations, bags of candy and costumes have been calling out to my children, building excitement and expectation for their dream holiday. For my kids, Halloween is a simple holiday that involves their two favorite things: candy and dressing up. For Christians, however, Halloween seems to be a bit more complicated.

No matter how you slice it, Halloween has a dark and seedy past. Its history can be traced to a Roman festival that involved worshiping the goddess of fruits and seeds, a pagan festival of the dead or a Celtic festival celebrating the end of summer. This latter part isn’t that bad, but the celebration of the spirit world coming close to the living world is. It’s difficult to encourage recognizing a holiday that has many touch points with the occult. How can Christians get behind a holiday that, at best…OK, there isn’t anything we can get behind in the history of Halloween.

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As a true Gen-Xer, I once again find myself angsty as I fully live between two dominant generational movements.  I standing in the middle of the evangelical boomers who are beat down after a dramatic ride as spearheading the religious right and the rising millennial evangelicals who are firmly embracing the religious left.

Back in the good ‘ol days the boomer evangelicals realized that they could join forces and become a political powerhouse.  The moral majority or the religious right led by James Dobson and others took shape and has been played a major role in the political world for 20+ years.  And in the predictable pattern of the pendulum, the next generation of evangelicals have pushed back on the way the religious right used their power and influence to crush, belittle, stereotype, and marginalize those who didn’t agree with their positions.  Abortion, Darwinism, and homosexuality were the issues that the religious right took up and made a stand for God and used the power of the government to get others to comply.

For a ton of reasons, the moral majority and the religious right have now gone the way of the dinosaur.

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Our culture is changing, shouldn’t our ministries adapt as well?

One of the areas of passion for me is contextualization. As our context becomes more and more post-Christian, I am realizing that the way forward is going to be complex and challenging. Because of this a couple of the youth pastors in my network whom I love and respect decided that we should host an event to wrestle through some of these issues.

We genuinely believe that the the community of youth workers in our context will have a much better shot finding a way forward than a book by an author from a totally different context or by the oner person with the biggest personality and loudest voice pushing their agenda.

In just one week we are going to take a big swing and gather our peeps from the Bay Area for this conversation. If you call the Bay Area home, would you consider coming? If you consider me a friend, would you come as a personal favor :) If you are no where near us, please pray for us and feel free to chime in!

Below is how we are wrestling through these issues.  I would love your thoughts on how you wrestle through these issues in your context. Continue Reading…

Every week before youth group we have a half hour leader’s meeting for our volunteer youth staff. This is, by far, the most important meeting of my week. It is an opportunity for our entire staff to touch base before we jump into another night of student ministry. Over the years these meetings have taken on many different looks. But as I continue to reflect on how to make that time a win for everyone, I have landed on my three most important components to an effective leader’s meeting.

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I am sure most of you can identify with putting together an amazing student ministry event and a significant number of students couldn’t make it because they were too busy with other things. Maybe you are experiencing your numbers dwindling at youth group because of the busy epidemic. Sports, plays, school, dance, vacations, college applications, general stress. All of these contribute to the knee jerk response, or excuse for why students don’t show up for things.

It is so easy to get down on students for their crazy schedules and their skewed priorities. But the truth is we are just as much to blame for self-important and busy lifestyles as well. Many of us would say that community, accountability, and prayer are vital the spiritual health of students. But the same is true for us youth workers. And whenever we have opportunities for youth workers to connect with one another for community, friendship, encouragement, accountability and prayer, I am overwhelmed by the total lack of interest.

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Do you have Gangnam Style?

September 24, 2012 — 3 Comments

“Who needs swag when you have Gangnam Style?” @comedytruth

Have you been watching Facebook or Twitter blow up this week with Gangnam Style references?  It has been a bit over whelming and to tell you the truth, I don’t really get it.  But me getting “it” is not the point.

They way pop culture trends move every little reference seems to travel through an incredibly steep and short life cycle.  A month ago, if you were into Gangnam Style you were part of a hip group of people who got to enjoy the front end of a trend.  Two weeks ago you were in the middle of the bell curve and if you could have used it in ministry would have been in the sweet spot of capitalizing on pop culture.  And if you are just now watching it, then, I am sad to break it to you, but you missed it.

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Last year’s Orange Conference was totally amazing!  The line up of speakers and break out seminars can not be beat.  And what Orange brings to the table that many other conferences out there is that they see the spiritual development of students is actually a unified plan from children’s ministry through college combined with partnering with parents.  How solid is that!  The only thing that would make the conference better is if you were there.  If you can at all swing it, I hope you join me and 5000 of my closest friends as we are inspired, equipped, and sent out for another year of great ministry!

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I am continually thankful for the resource Orange is for me and for our church.  If you have never used Orange or they are not on your radar, their strategy for connecting the church and the family is head and shoulders above anything else out there.

If you went last year, what were some of your highlights?

As you think about how you will be trained this year and how you will train your staff, why don’t you consider joining me in Atlanta, GA this April for the Orange Conference. This is an entire conference designed to wrestle with the intentional partnership between the church and the family.  (Plus, I need a roommate)

If you use something else and/or something better, would you be willing to share.  We as youth workers continually need to be sharpened, so sharpen away.

This last week I read a really helpful book by Reggie Joiner and Carey Nieuwhof called Parenting Beyond Your Capacity. This is a straightforward book that offers a clear roadmap for parents who want to connect their family to a wider community of faith. And for parents who think that going at it alone is best, Joiner and Nieuwhof offer a compelling argument for the need to invite others into the circle so that our kids have the widest safety net possible as our kids grow into adults and explore a faith separate from ours.

Parenting Beyond Your Capacity is kind of like a primer for parents to understand the Orange concept of parenting. Being an orange parent is understanding that “a parent’s influence is best realized in partnership with a wider community.” And that community is the church. If you are looking for a book to share with parents to help them understand the orange model of ministry than this book is for you. This book highlights 5 family values that are key for the long term spiritual health and maturity of kids and students.

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Try XP3 for FREE!

September 19, 2012 — Leave a comment

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Being that it is Orange week and we are getting the ball rolling for the annual Orange conference in HOTlanta this spring, the nice people at XP3 are giving away one of their series for FREE!!  So follow the steps below and try out this amazing curriculum.

300x250_curric1“XP3 is designed as a comprehensive student curriculum that helps students experience their faith in three areas. Wonder. Discovery. Passion.  XP3 Students is part of Orange, a comprehensive strategy for all age groups.

XP3 gives you a plan. You’re in control of how you use it.

Try our XP3 Students “Intersect” series for free and see the difference for yourself.

Before you sign up for the free series, feel free to read more about us on the XP3 Students blog, or find out more about Orange and XP3 by visiting ThinkOrange.com.

When you’re ready to “Try XP3 for Free”, just follow these steps to get started:

• Go to https://secure.rethinkgroup.org/v1/registration/?prod=XP3S

• Complete the requested information

• When you get to the order information page, scroll down to the Promo Code field, enterXP3FREESERIES4 and click apply code

• Complete the requested information.

Please contact our XP3 team at xp3@rethinkgroup.org should you have any questions.”

If you are interested in coming to the conference in Atlanta, make sure you check out the conference website today.

I think Will Smith was onto something with this anthem for all those angsty kids in the late 80’s.  And now as someone who works with students and has to deal with parents all the time, this anthem could be just as applicable for us youth workers today!

As youth workers, our entire lives are wrapped up in connecting with students and helping them connect to Jesus.  We spend countless hours doing contact work, developing compelling youth groups, and planning special trips and camps.  And the worst part is that parents just don’t understand!

How many times have we had conversations with parents who just don’t seem to get the importance of what we are doing.  It is us who are standing in the gap, who are the last line of defense in the faith development of their children.  They don’t help their kids show up at youth group or our special events.  They seem to think sports, school, and family vacations are more important than youth group.  How do they not realize how important our programs are?

This regular frustration of mine got a major tweak this last weekend.

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teacher1To buy curriculum or to write your own?

This is a debate that never seems to die.  The young guns have convictions, the veterans have their experience, the big churches have resources and the smaller ones are simply happy to have someone show up and love kids.  In the midst of all these differences there still is the un answered question of whether or not this is a good idea.

Here is the deal, we all come to the table with a completely different gift set and context in which we find ourselves. And because of that, we all need help and support in different areas.  However, no matter what kind of ministry you lead, no matter how big or small your context is, you MUST have a curriculum.  The real question is what will your curriculum be.

There must be some rhyme or reason to what you teach and when you teach it.  Purchased curriculum is great in that it lays out what each lesson is and usually puts it together in a cycle that builds upon itself and reinforces the lessons that have been taught.  There are many good options out there for this.  My favorite is XP3 by Orange.  I have written a little bit about their scope and cycle before.

Who needs curriculum, I have the Holy Spirit!

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How much money are you worth?

September 10, 2012 — 8 Comments

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$250,000.  This is how much money I think that I am worth.  The problem I am having is finding someone who agrees.  Although this may be my worth, my value as a youth worker is significantly lower.  And here is where the rub occurs.  You see, we all have a strong sense of worth, but it is determining our value that is the true challenge.

The difference between worth and value can be clarified by a simple craig’s list transaction.  A couple of years ago I wanted to get an iphone.  I mean I couldn’t see straight, I wanted an iphone so bad.  The deal was I had to pay cash for the phone and for whatever cost it would be to switch services.  Easy enough.  I grabbed my digital camera and started posting on craig’s list.

I quickly realized that items that were worth a certain amount to me, had a significantly lower street value.  And at every sale, I had to decide what the items true value was.  Sometimes I did ok, and sometimes I got taken pretty hard, but after a couple of weeks, my garage was clean and I was making calls on my new iphone.

What does this have to do with you or with me?  It has to do with wrestling with our value as youth workers.  How much money are we worth as youth workers?  We feel called to student ministry and we feel called to work at a particular church.   Then we are offered a salary package and with out even realizing it, we are confronted with the difference between our worth and our value.

No one tells us youth workers who simply want to serve God and love students that there is an actual science to salary negotiations.  So after some painful negotiations of my own and a couple awful ones for some of my friends, here are a couple of pointers that may be helpful for you next time you are sitting around the salary negotiations table:

A couple of weeks ago we had our monthly Manly Mecca meeting.  This is a new approach to our guys’ ministry that was inspired by a show on MTV actually.  After we sat around and did our monthly check in, share our deepest darkest and be honest about every guys’ struggle, and try not to pay the jar, we headed out for a little project.

We take our fall kick off very seriously.  I think a solid youth ministry has purposeful events, and the kick off sets the tone for the year and direction for our entire ministry.  To make our first youth group special, I thought it would be fun to highlight the guys in our ministry and make a Carly Rae video.  I know they have been around all summer and are old news, but that is how I roll, about 6 months behind the curve.

I think it is important to embrace the music that is the sound track of our students lives and use them to have a Dance Party, or simply to use it to solidify great youth ministry memories.  And that is what we did.  This video is the result of some really hard work by one of my students, and in a way totally highlights some of my biggest passions and values.

With all the chaos and work that goes into getting the school year up and going and pulling off our fall kick off, I am tired.  So I apologize for the shoddy post.  But it is Friday, and it is time for some rest.  I hope and pray that you have a great weekend and get some good old fashioned rest this weekend as well.  In fact not resting is breaking one of the 10 commandments.  How cool is that, taking a nap is what you are called to do this weekend.

We’ll all get back after it on Monday. So until then . . .

Blessings!