There are two competing truths that are attempting to live together in the youth ministry world.
Truth 1) The process of adolescence is lengthening. In the 1950’s, most sociologists agreed that by the time someone was 16 they had completed the process of individuation. And in the 70’s it was around 18, then in the 90’s it was the early 20’s,and now its believed to be the late 20’s. Chap Clark has done a ton of work in helping youth workers and parents understand this process. Even TIME magazine is on board with this truth.
Truth 2) Students today are so over having youth ministry be fun and light. They are ready for deep theology, emerging worship practices, justice ministry, and being missional.
As I have been trying to bridge the gap of these two truths, I have been coming up short. Over the past year or so I have been intentionally wrestling with these competing truths, and I keep coming to an un-politically correct conclusion: I firmly agree that while adolescence is lengthening, students are not developmentally prepared or ready for some of the deeper things of christianity.
(If your interested in how I came to this conclusion, I wrote about it here)
Because youth workers are doing youth ministry longer, it makes sense that we have our spiritual growth overflow into the heart of our ministry. But as the developmental gap widens, we have to be so much more thoughtful and aware of differentiating our issues and growing edge with those of our students.
Which leaves me wondering: Where are the books that actually equip those of us in the field who work with middle school and high school students that address this phenomena on the front end?
Because, if this lengthening is real, then the implication is not just that students are behaving like adolescents well into their 20’s. It also means that current high school students are behaving and processing the world the same way middle schoolers were just 10 years earlier. This truth leaves me with some unresolved questions:
If that is true, then shouldn’t high school ministry today look more similar to jr high ministry of 10 years ago, opposed to looking more like college ministry?
If this is where our high schoolers are at, what in the world are we supposed to do with our middle schoolers?
How do we walk with students who are engaged in and exposed to very adult material and are even less able to process these experiences because they are even more developmentally delayed then we are aware of?
Are you noticing this in your ministries?
Student ministry is changing at break-neck speeds because students are becoming more and more complex. They are exposed to more complex and adult issues at a time in their lives when they are becoming less developmentally prepared to deal with them. While this is very overwhelming, I am committed to figuring it out. I want to walk well with students through this crazy season of their lives. I so want God to use my feeble efforts to be part of the redeeming process, and not be the part that needs to be redeemed. Thankfully, no matter what, God uses all of it (the good, the bad, and the ugly), as part of his authoring and perfecting of their faith. Thanks be to God!
I have recently been invited to be a regular contributor at youthmin.org. It is a great group of people who are trying to mix up the conversation regarding student ministry. If you don’t already read them, I highly recommend it. Have a great day!
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Great post ben.
I have noticed delayed adolescence in my ministry/church. One thing I have noticed is that teens who go away for a year to Bible College, or YWAM come back more matured. Just an interesting observation.
Also, I have been looking at churches who are dealing with delayed adolescence. One church that has been quite sucessful is Mars Hill Seattle. They place a high call on follow Christ. The first chapter in Darren Patrick’s book, The Church Planter, also deals with this issue. His observations is that we need to call young people to be the church, and not just participants of it.
I think that instead of moving with the cultural stream, we try to swim against for the sake of our students. It will take more and harder work on our part, but it will be fruitful work. It will take coordinating with our children’s and family ministries, encouraging parents t begin the discipleship process at home, and calling “sacred groups” of a few students to take the next step spiritually instead of keeping the large group in one place. Jesus did that, and I think we can as well.
Great insights. thanks!
I definitely see these two truths looming. I have been a bit frustrated as high school students cry out for “deeper” stuff, yet if I give them a challenge of a simple spiritual discipline they blow it off and give no real effort. I should not be surprised when they act like high school students (or even middle school students like you say), but it is still frustrating.
Great post Ben. I have been reading on the iPad for a while now but wanted to comment.
On Friday night the youth group at my church had combined high school night run by Soul Survivor. It was a great night, really deep with even a bit of prophetic prayer thrown in. At the end of the night one of the older high school youth thought it was a bit “watered down”.
In the debrief of the night the young adult leaders were so exact and “deep” in their review of the night. When I was leading high schoolers in my early 20′s we would finish the youth night then go home but these leaders stayed back for an hour. I think the current generation of young adults is seeking deeper meaning and are leading with deeper purpose, good on them.
I know this is not in every church but lets tell the good news.
Good thoughts and insights from everyone, thanks for sharing. For what it’s worth, here’s my humble observations:
1) Perhaps a dynamic at play here is that students don’t know what they really want, or do know, but don’t know how to express it. Maybe their request for more serious material is actually their request to be taken more seriously, which is two different things. This would certainly cause frustration between adults who serve youth and the youth themselves: “I thought this is what you wanted!”
2) If my guess in #1 is right at all, then the solution to our student’s developmental and spiritual needs is found in what we, as the adult community of the church, are willing to invest in students. Providing a structure that supports a wider group of adolescents is a costly mission, and from my extremely limited experience (in comparison to many of you veterans) it’s often the adults who back away from creating and sustaining such ministries, not the kids. I haven’t been in youth ministry for too long to be an expert, but I am inclined to declare that Rule #1 for youth ministry is that we (this church) can never have greater expectations of our students than what we expect of ourselves. We expect 30 kids to show up to 2, 2-hour programs every week, when only two of us adults (the legal requirement) will make that same commitment, and I think we often don’t realize that this is crazy.
3) What I’m getting at in #2 is that in order to deal with the flux of culture that we are in, the solution is increased dedication on part of the church to respond to each student as the struggle with the oscillating maturity levels of themselves (and their peers), and the troubling invasion of adult issues into their lives. I think Brad has it absolutely right on this. At least until we figure this cultural shift out, it wouldn’t hurt us to build structures that allow us to take the individual needs, development level, and ability of each student seriously. I think your previous idea to do parent/teacher conference-style meetings is a good example of this. But that will take tiiiiiiiiimmmmeee, unless you have 5 students in your church.